Wednesday Night Bible Study 27 May 2020
/How to Combat Loneliness While Social Distancing
The Bible has practical solutions for the problems we face in our lives. God wants us all to have underlying joy and fulfillment even when we are experiencing sadness and loneliness! That's difficult when you feel alone and it seems that no one cares.
First of all, please don't feel you are weak or weird because you feel lonely. There's no need to feel ashamed of your loneliness. In fact, if you find one or two friends to talk with about it, you will probably find that they feel lonely also (or have at one time or another), and you can encourage each other. Also remember that God wants to be your best friend—He wants you to talk with Him about everything. And as your relationship with God becomes stronger and more intimate, you will feel less loneliness.
What Does the Bible Say About Coping With Loneliness?
The Bible is God's instruction manual for life. It provides the answers we need and gives us comfort, peace and hope for a brighter tomorrow. God inspired it to be profitable and beneficial for us (2 Timothy 3:16-17). Can the Bible really show us how to experience less loneliness—regardless of our situation? And does the Bible show us how to have joy and success in life and in our relationships in spite of being lonely? Let's look at some specific biblical principles that can help us cope with loneliness.
Did God design and create us to desire and need companionship, friendship and fellowship?
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up. Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm; but how can one be warm alone? Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
The implication is that two people are much stronger together than one person is alone. God designed us to want companionship and friendship and to find our greatest fulfillment in loving others. To feel alone and unloved hurts terribly. We want to help you to know how to cope with feeling lonely as long as that continues. Plus we want you to know what God will do to help you and what you can do for yourself—how you can reach out to others to build relationships.
Does God understand my loneliness?
Hebrews 4:14-16
Seeing then that we have a great High Priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
Matthew 27:46
And about the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, "Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?" that is, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?"
First, God created us and all of our emotions, so He surely understands us. And Jesus experienced loneliness not just because He felt His Father had forsaken Him when He was on the cross. Just think, no other human being was converted or anywhere near His spiritual level, so their capacity for spiritual fellowship was quite shallow (John 2:24-25). No one was completely faithful to Jesus. His 11 disciples were the most committed, and even those 11 forsook Him at His greatest hour of need. So Jesus Christ has experienced every human emotion, and He knows what it's like to be lonely. Talk to Him about it!
Is it God's plan for us to have strong family relationships?
Genesis 2:18
And the Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him."
Psalm 68:5-6
A father of the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy habitation. God sets the solitary in families; He brings out those who
are bound into prosperity; but the rebellious dwell in a dry land.
After God created Adam, He knew that Adam needed someone to share his life with him. Adam was simply not complete being alone. Marriage is a divine institution ordained by God. Families become the natural place for us to have personal relationships with others and to know we are not alone. If you have family, be sure you connect and contribute to their happiness and peace. Many of us have dysfunctional families, but if we love them unconditionally (following God's example in Romans 5:8) and work to fulfill the needs of other family members, we often can improve the situation (Philippians 2:4).
But even if we don't have a physical family we can depend on, God says He "sets the solitary in families" (Psalm 68:6). His Church can be a spiritual family a hundred times larger than a physical family (Mark 10:29-30). God tells His Church to "consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together" (Hebrews 10:24-25). Above all, we can develop a close
relationship with our Heavenly Father and our Elder Brother, Jesus Christ.
But I'm a widow and live alone. How can God help me feel better?
1 Timothy 5:5
Now she who is really a widow, and left alone, trusts in God and continues in supplications and prayers night and day.
If you are widowed and alone, put your trust in God. Talk to Him about your loneliness. Let Him know what your heart desires. Jesus Christ promises that whatever we ask in His name, according to His will, He will give to us (John 14:14; 1 John 5:14). Nothing is impossible for God (Mark 10:27).
I've been lonely for so long, why isn't God helping me?
Hebrews 13:5
Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you
nor forsake you."
James 4:8
Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.
Sometimes God requires us to build character in ways we would not have chosen for ourselves. Coping with loneliness may be one of those ways God is allowing your character to be tested. Will we learn to be content with the blessings God has given us? Will we really believe God is with us and that we have not been left truly alone?
Remembering that God will never leave us can be much needed encouragement when we feel abandoned by others. And when we try to draw near to God, we can be assured that He will draw near to us.
My loneliness leads to anxiety and worry. What can I do to stop being afraid?
1 Peter 5:6-7
Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.
Psalm 23:4-6
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; my cup runs over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
Worry, fear, anxiety. All of these emotions can tear us down, cause depression and negatively reinforce feelings of loneliness. But our Father says He will take care of everything! He provides for the sparrows; He can certainly provide for us (Luke 12:6-7). God is a loving Father who loves us even more than any parent loves his or her little child. Learn to trust Him to care for every need you have.
Sometimes I wonder, What's the use? I feel despair and hopelessness.
Psalm 147:3
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
Psalm 94:19
In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul.
Romans 15:4
For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.
Loneliness is a condition that we must deal with. Continuing in a state of loneliness often leads to the even more serious condition of
depression.
Please don't think you have to cope by yourself. Please ask for help. God gives healing and comfort in many ways—through His Word, the Bible; through His Spirit; and through His intervention in our lives. And God often answers prayers by directing us to people who can help us. You can get help from trusted friends and your minister. If the problem is really serious and deep-seated, there are Christian counselors who can give professional help.
Does trusting God imply action on our part as well?
James 2:26
For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also.
John 14:21
‘He who has My commandments and keeps them, it is he who loves Me. And he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and manifest Myself to him."
Matthew 7:21
“Not everyone who says to Me, 'Lord, Lord,' shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven."
We begin to see that some action is needed on our part. Yes, we learn to trust God to provide for our needs. If we expect Him to answer our prayers, to provide for our needs and to comfort us in times of loneliness, does He expect anything in return? The simple answer is yes! We not only should reach out to others to befriend and encourage them, but we also must believe God and we must do what He says to do. We must keep His Commandments. We must live by every Word of God. The entire Bible is written by inspiration of God (2 Timothy 3:16), so we must believe the Bible and live by it.
Apply Now
What are some specific things you can do to cope with your loneliness?
There are many circumstances that cause loneliness, so although this list is not comprehensive, it can provide some guidelines for your
personal situation. Doing these things will help you make progress along the road out of loneliness.
Direct your thinking outward to others rather than thinking excessively about self.
Determine that you can control your own attitudes and emotions. Ask God for His Spirit of love and joy (Galatians 5:22).
Be friendly! Smile! Laugh! Positive actions and emotions are contagious and will encourage others to want to be around you (Proverbs 18:24).
Volunteer your service to others. There are various volunteer programs at hospitals, schools and libraries. Consider visiting a
nursing home to cheer up the patients. You will soon have a different perspective about loneliness.Learn new things. Develop a new hobby. Expand your interests. Engage in conversations with others about current events and common
interests.Use technology to be in touch. When used properly the Internet can be an amazing blessing for communication and interaction with
others. E-mail, Facebook and Twitter can be fun!Establish a circle of friends that you talk to on the phone. Include people who may also be in lonely situations. Make it your mission to
help them. Ask me about shut-ins or those who could use extra encouragement. Every day you can help brighten someone else's day.
If you have deep loneliness and depression you can't pull out of, please seek help through counseling or fill out a contact card here on our site. Our church leaders will reach out to you.
Stay rooted in God. I’m rooting for you.
Blessings,
Pastor Greg